"You should stop watching tv.
Go outside. Have some fun. Go play on the swing set," his mom said. Her
son turned around to look up at her.
"Ok. I'm kinda bored. I don't
really want to play on the swings though. I can't decide what I want to
do," the little boy said scrunching his face.
"Hmmm... time to use your
imagination. If you could do anything you wanted today, what would you want to
do?"
After thinking for less than a
minute, the boy got up from the spot where he always sat, on the floor, in
front of the tv, and declared with a pointed finger in the air, “today I’m
going to be the cat!”
“I’m going to lie around the house
and move from place to place following the sun. I’m going to swish my tail ever
so slightly for most of the day, and then whip it back and forth whenever the
dog walks by. I’m going to lick my paw and lazily clean my ears and whiskers.
I’m going to look you in the face with big round eyes, and blink, blink, blink,
instead of responding. When you’re out of the room, I’m going to scream,
“MMMmmmmeeeeoooowwww?” When you least expect it, I’m going to jump off the
chair in the living room, run to the dining room, jump to the table, then to
the counter, then to the top of the pantry cupboard. From there I'll tease the
dogs. When you go outside, I’m going to stretch up on my hind feet and bat at
the door handle. I’m going to scream a slightly different, “MmmmmmEEEooooWWW!!”
I'll beg to go outside and when you let me out, I'll eat grass, and attack
bugs, and hunt birds. When a car drives by I'll pouf up real big, and when
somebody walks past the house, I'll hiss because I hate strangers. When you’re
walking up or down stairs, I’ll try to trip you. I’m going to jump up and rub
on your knee, run two stairs in front of you, wait, and weave into your legs.
Anytime you move, I’m going to follow you. I'll be your shadow. When you go
into the bathroom, I'll sit and scream at the door until you let me in. Then
I'll sit and watch you 'til I get bored. Then I'll try and knock all of your
soaps and creams off of the counter and into the sink. I'll also pull out the
sink stoppers because I hate those things. I'll pull some toilet paper off the
roll and try to eat it as fast as possible before you can get to me and make me
spit it out. At night, I’ll hear you open a bottle of pop. I don’t know what
room I’ll be in or how far away I’ll come running from, but I’ll come. If you
don’t give me the bottle cap, I’ll rub my face all over the mouth of the
bottle. If you walk away from the bottle, I might knock it over… if you don’t
give me the cap. After you throw the cap for me to chase, I’ll fetch it and
then take it into the laundry room and put it in my food. I’ll eat around it
like I haven’t eaten in days. When I’m full, I’ll bring the bottle cap back to
you, and you will play with me. If you don’t play with me, if you don’t pay
attention to me, I'll dig my claws into your nice leather furniture… or maybe
I’ll jump onto your bookshelf and start knocking off all your little
knickknacks. I'll make you play with me. While you’re getting ready for bed,
I’ll start planning my night. There will be a lot that I need to take care of
while everyone in the house is sleeping. I need to throw up somewhere. That
will take a bit of time to plan. Should it be in the kitchen where someone will
step on it and everyone will see it? Or should it be in a corner somewhere and
you won’t see it for days? I’ll also need to knock over your garbage can. I’m
sure there is something in there that you’ve been keeping from me. I’ll pull
those stoppers out of the sink again because I’m sure you’ve put them back in
by now. I also need to jump into bed before you’ve tucked in so that I can make
sure I get the best sleeping position. Around five, I’ll wake you up so
you can give me another handful of food. You love that. At some point, I’ll
knock something off your desk. It'll fall on the dog. She’ll jump up all scared
and stupid. That will make me happy.”
“And just like that you’ve got a
busy day planned,” his mother said chuckling and shaking her head.
The little boy
just looked his mother in the face. And with big round eyes, he blinked -
blink, blink, blink - instead of responding.
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